Jump to content

[KFC] El Burro

Members
  • Posts

    477
  • Joined

  • Last visited

Posts posted by [KFC] El Burro

  1. It comes out on PC in April next year Vassie...

    U should buy a PS2 just for the occasion :)

    my guess is may next year, look at gta3 en vc :P

    Gamespot said March... thats why i Said April :lol:

    I guess May is gonna be the final month they'll wanna release it in or else people like Vassie are gonna be pissed off...

  2. No no no... they better not add that Driv3r felony shit, just running a red light and the cops are crawling up you ass... maybe thats the concept of the Difficulties :? On easy the cops don't bust your ass when you run a red light, speed or mount the curb but on Hard they do along with other little tweaks. Even if this isn't the case, i dunno why R* would program the cops to shoot to kill when you run a red... I mean, they ain't daft.

    I do think they mean that NPC are going to get involved in car chases and shootups if they abide the same laws as you. Also means we may see the return of Muggers...

    At this point, nothing full hardy has been given away, not even in the many screens now in possesion by the public... we can only sit and wait.

  3. :: Carjacking will be much more difficult.

    :: New melee combat including pistol whips and banging heads off the dashboard of a car. Carl learns more as his abilities increase.

    :: Stunts and tricks can be performed while on bicycles.

    :: Different gyms offer different styles of combat.

    :: Cops on motorbikes will fire their weapons while chasing.

    :: Players can drive their vehicles through billboards, breaking them.

    GYM INFO:

    You'll be able to visit one of several gyms spread throughout San Andreas so that you work out to stay in peak physical health. The gyms are all different in terms of equipment and patronage, but each has a variety of workout options to help you burn off unwanted pounds, build stamina and muscle, and learn to fight. Beefing up your fighting skills will probably get very interesting, because doing so will let you learn new fighting moves that complement the basic ones CJ starts out with. By taking on an opponent in the boxing ring, CJ can learn a variety of pugilistic methods, which include punch combos, punching on the ground, and punching while running.

    Getting Tattoos

    Gamers can alter the their clothes and body type so that they can become exactly the kind of gangsta they want to be. CJ must first find himself a tattoo parlor, the first of which just so happens to be next to his barber. Once inside, he'll be able to select his tattoo from a long list of available styles for the body part he wants to ink. The majority of these tattoos are made up of gang affiliations, gang-related lingo, and other similar things that are drawn in styles that were popular for 1990s-era Los Angeles. Each city's tattoo parlors will offer different varieties of tattoos with symbols to fit the culture of each city.

    Improved Camera Controls

    When using the camera in weapons mode, the right analog stick allows you to target your opposition with any and all ranged weapons, and you no longer have to stay in a fixed position while doing so. Furthermore, gamers can choose to aim with the R-Stick while running and strafing with the Left analog stick. This new additions means that you can always look in a different direction while running or driving, allowing you to turn your attention where ever you need to without adjusting the momentum of your forward movement. The difference in gameplay should be huge.

    Cars Getting Dirty

    Driving around the dusty state of San Andreas can really put the hurt on your vehicle in terms of its cleanliness. Should players get their hands on a brand new spotless car, they might want to take note that it won't stay that way for long; as consistent use of that vehicle will begin to accumulate a whole lot of muck for it. Dirt, for instance, will begin to appear on and around the wheel wells and impact areas brought on by traffic accidents. Driving through parks and other sections with overhead filth sources can move grime and dust to the surface areas of your windshield. And unless you can find a car wash to keep your car clean and shiny, it may even rust over time if used too much.

    As an added bonus, the NPC characters of San Andreas seem to play by the same rules you do. As not only will their cars remain dirty if left uncleaned as we mentioned earlier, but they'll sport broken windows, loose bumpers, and bullet-riddled doors too. If you're looking for any more proof that Rockstar is trying to move its game into as persistent a world as possible - this is it.

    Gang Tactics

    Gangs in Grand Theft Auto play an important roll. Rockstar plans on making gangs act just as they would in real life. During their downtime, for instance, gang members aren't simply just standing there doing nothing; they're chilling out with each other and drinking, smoking, greeting each other, and throwing signs. They'll even engage in idle discussions with one another to add that much more to the relationship. But if one gang (maybe yours) should cross into another gang's turf, the hoodlums will come after each other with guns a-blazin'

    15 NEW SCREENSHOTAGES!

    screen27.jpg

    screen28.jpg

    screen29.jpg

    screen30.jpg

    screen31.jpg

    screen32.jpg

    screen33.jpg

    screen34.jpg

    screen35.jpg

    screen36.jpg

    screen37.jpg

    screen38.jpg

    screen39.jpg

    screen40.jpg

    screen41.jpg

  4. Yeah... gettin chased by the cops. They have a pretty funny line in that song, the one where they memnton B&Q, iv'e forgotton how it goes...

    Anyway...

    Crash Test Dummies- MMM MMM MMM MMM (Nice song)

    Then its The Hives- B is for Brutus

  5. *Bumped like a bitch

    Tenacious D: Tribute... thens its gonna be Tenacious D: Tribute again coz I love the song so much...

    Long time ago me and my brother Kyle here,

    we was hitchhikin' down a long and lonesome road.

    All of a sudden, there shined a shiny demon... in the middle... of the road.

    And he said:

    [sung]

    "Play the best song in the world, or I'll eat your soul." (soul)

    [spoken]

    Well me and Kyle, we looked at each other,

    and we each said... "Okay."

    [sung]

    And we played the first thing that came to our heads,

    Just so happened to be,

    The Best Song in the World, it was The Best Song in the World.

    Look into my eyes and it's easy to see

    One and one make two, two and one make three,

    It was destiny.

    Once every hundred-thousand years or so,

    When the sun doth shine and the moon doth glow

    And the grass doth grow...

    Needless to say, the beast was stunned.

    'Whip-crack' went his swampy tail,

    And the beast was done.

    He asked us: "(snort) Be you angels?"

    And we said, "Nay. We are but men."

    Rock!

    Ahhh, ahhh, ahhh-ah-ah,

    Ohhh, whoah, ah-whoah-oh!

    ^My fave part of the song... u need to listen to this to appriciate it...

  6. This is from a KFC Crew War we had today with proberly the closest fight EVER in the history of the MTA... also proberly the one with the most flaming too... It was like ULK V KFC :shock:

    *KFC@Jupiter: ORUSS ALL UP TO YOU

    @KFC@the-man: whos left

    @KFC@the-man: i died

    !KFC!$3r9!0: EL BURRO IS COMIN

    !KFC*ElBurro: ME

    @KFC@the-man: i killed snomane

    !KFC!$3r9!0: IN A BIKE

    !KFC!SNOMANE: I KILLED U

    @KFC@Orguss: Noone is left

    !KFC!$3r9!0: YES

    @KFC@the-man: i kille du first

    !KFC!$3r9!0: EL BURRO

    $KFC$OutLaW: elburro is left

    KfC*WheeLman: orguss and elburro

    !KFC!SNOMANE: BS

    !KFC!$3r9!0: lol el burro

    *KFC@Jupiter: ORGUSS AND ELBURRO

    *KFC@Jupiter: REMEMBER RULES

    @KFC@Orguss: where is Elburro?

    *KFC@Jupiter: Hmmm

    !KFC*ElBurro: OUSIDE THE DOOR HONEY

    KfC*WheeLman: someone can go for elburro

    KfC*WheeLman: (from AK)

    KfC*WheeLman: nvm

    KfC*WheeLman: hes fighting

    *KFC@Jupiter: may I spawn so I can spec

    !KFC*ElBurro killed @KFC@Orguss. (Stubby Shotgun)

    @KFC@Orguss killed !KFC*ElBurro. (Stubby Shotgun)

    KfC*WheeLman: oooo

    !KFC!$3r9!0: HAHA

    @KFC@Orguss: hmm

    !KFC*ElBurro: aw

    !KFC!$3r9!0: WTF!!?

    *KFC@Jupiter: what do we do?

    !KFC!$3r9!0: HAHAH

    KfC*WheeLman: AK WINS

    @KFC@Blades: bye got 2 go

    *KFC@Jupiter: OK

    !KFC*ElBurro: HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

    @KFC@the-man: lol

    *KFC@Jupiter: HOW?

    KfC*WheeLman: AK WINS!!!!!!!!!!!

  7. My Desktop is the same it was back in February... I can't find anything else better to shove there. It has been changed a few times but they only last a few days before it gets changed back to the Red Dwarf.

    I have many Icons on my Desktop coz im too lazy to go find them... :roll:

    GCS0021.jpg

  8. It would be... but R* have said with the scripting they use a co-op or Online version of San Andreas would be impossible... for them to make anyway, I dunno if the MTA team have any plans to try and make an MTA:SA... Im sure we all hope so

  9. Heres the post I have on the KFC forums:

    GAMESPY SAIS:

    'One particular website spoke of a quote from the UK's Official PlayStation 2 Magazine, where it was stated that SA would ship on a dual-layered DVD to accommodate the huge size of the three cities. Nothing official from Rockstar has been mentioned at this stage, however'

    ^This is crap, don't listen to em'. It IS coming on a dual layer DVD and that WAS confirmed by Rockstar... they are filling that Disk to thee MAX!

    .::ADDED JULY 27th 2004::.

    SA CONTENT LIST

    :: The state of San Andreas consists of 3 major cities; Los Angeles (Los Santos), San Francisco (San Fierro), Las Vegas (Las Venturra); each the size of Vice City

    :: Overhauled graphics engine means crisper quality, realistic shadowing and reflections, and independent day- and night-time models

    :: Tons of fully-rendered interiors

    :: Restaraunts

    :: Fully operational casino

    :: The city directly affects your characters progression, abilities, and even appearance

    :: Appearances and mentioning of past GTA characters

    :: Well known voice acting talents

    :: Increased AI and NPC recording sessions

    :: Missions will be made to suit your skill level

    :: Ability to recruit gang members for missions

    :: Four-person drive-by

    :: Your actions while not on missions reflect your position in the storyline

    :: Ability to rob houses

    :: You must eat to stay healty and maintain stamina

    :: The city reacts to your characters health and appearance

    :: You can go to the gym to work out

    :: Improved Manhunt-like targeting system

    :: New melee combat animations

    :: Ability to swim

    :: New weapons, more variety, revamped old weapons

    :: Improved car handling

    :: More modes of transportation

    :: More populated, more detailed, has more cars, weapons, challenges, characters, secrets, music, and more storyline than Vice City. The three cities have their own individual style; architectural style, vehicle population, mission types, character’s accents, and the actions of pedestrians.

    :: There are new vehicles that can’t even be used in a town, such as a quad bike, that you can race in the country. San Fierro is very hilly and there is a big emphasis on driving in this part of the game.

    :: Swimming was added because Rockstar knew about the constant request and was tired of being told it couldn’t be done. Not a huge emphasis was made on swimming, as the feature is there for playability.

    :: In addition to eating, getting fat, and working out at the gym, another stat feature is cutting your hair. You can go to the barber and get your haircut how you want. If you have a bad haircut, pedestrians make fun of you and call you stupid. If you have a good one they are impressed.

    :: The LA vibe is there with the smog, crystalline light, the thud of a basketball off in a court, the air filled with hip hop, the blazing sun, the light reflecting off low ridersbouncing with hydraulics.

    :: Individualized each player’s experience to make the game as non-linear as possible.

    :: The draw distance is now twice as much as Vice City in the urban environments and four times as much in the countryside.

    :: The character models are much more detailed than previously.

    :: The only loading times in San Andreas are slight pauses when entering buildings.

    :: Game will be on a Dual-Layer DVD.

    :: First-person has returned!

    :: When you target someone with a weapon, green will be displayed if they have full health, yellow at half, and red if they can be killed in another shot. The auto targeting will also make much better choices based on threat level.

    :: Control territories and make money off your property. Some parts of the game you can take it over yourself, and for other parts you will need your gang.

    :: Car jacking has an even more threatening and sinister vibe than before, because now your gang is involved.

    :: On the game map Los Santos is only a tiny bit in the lower right corner.

    :: You can wear a lot of new clothes.

    :: Dual wield multiple gun types.

    :: More mini games.

    :: Vehicles get rusty and dirty as time goes by.

    :: Carl's customizations include: Hairstyle, Physique, Weight, Driveing Skills, Clothes, Possessions, Weapon Skills, Chracter, Relationships, Gang.

    :: The art team has snuck in plenty of special pictures and messages for fans.

    :: For the first time in a series the game will adjust its diffculty if the player becomes stuck. Rockstar assures that that the adjustments will be minimal and almost invisible to the players, so the missions won't become a breeze.

    :: At least once every couple of days your characer has to eat. If you skip meals he will be come weak, and if you feed him too much he gets slow and then gets fat. There is a wide selection of places to eat... so what you eat counts as well. Strength will effect his punches, but bulk up at the gym too much and he will loose speed...

    :: San Andreas has its own version of Hollywood called Vinewood.

    :: When the OGF fell from power, the new rival gangs The Flats and The Ballas moved in.

    :: Brian Johnson is CJ's 10 year old brother that died in an accident and the reason he went to Liberty City prison for five years.

    :: The Johnson family is in disarray as Carl and Kendl can't get along with Sweet.

    :: Frank Tenpenny and Eddie Polaski know CJ from when he was in juvenile hall, and now they harass him in SA.

    :: Cesar, a new Latino character wearing baggy slacks, an undershirt, tattoos, and a buzzcut has been confirmed.

    :: Old Reece is CJ's old barber that still gives him haircuts anytime he comes in.

    :: A combine harvester with razor-sharp blades working on a field.

    :: A dirtbike (similar to Sanchez from Vice City) riding through the forest.

    :: Articulated trucks, including ones with huge detachable gas canisters.

    :: A monster truck riding through a valley and a shallow river bed.

    :: A jeep overlooking the sunset on a cliff.

    :: An SUV driving through the meadows.

    :: An ATV racing on a dirt track.

    :: Carl can attack enemies from behind, after hiding and sneaking through the shadows.

    :: Carl's ability to swim and the length of time he can stay underwater for depends on his fitness and how often he practices swimming.

    :: Members of The Orange Grove Families wear green clothes.

    :: The Ballas gang members wear purple clothes.

    :: Models will include up to 50% more polygons than Vice City.

    :: Bicycles will move forward when the X button is held down, but tapping it will make the player travel faster.

    :: Carl can roll to the side during combat on the press of a button.

    :: Players can now pivot the camera around the car, in order to gain a better view.

    :: A choice of haircuts are available, from shaven/bald heads to 'Afro' style cuts.

    :: Not only can players choose new hairstyles, but choices of beards and other facial hair will be at their disposal

    :: San Andreas is to be somewhat shaped like the USA with Los Santos being in the lower right hand corner.

    :: At Reece's Barber shop, you can scroll through a series of haircuts and styles. some are about $500 to the maximum.

    :: Due to harsh sunrays, some of the streets will be tinted with a yellowish-orange hue.

    :: During a 4 person driveby, the players will have independent targets to shoot at. There is also a health indicator for the gang's car.

    :: Achivements met during some missions will afftect the lesiures CJ has as the game progresses.

    (I never listen to Gamespy)

  10. Disconnected: Connection timed out. (Delay = 5 sec)

    Auto Reconnect in 5 Secs, Please Wait

    Connecting...

    Disconnected: Connection timed out. (Delay = 5 sec)

    Auto Reconnect in 5 Secs, Please Wait

    Connecting...

    Disconnected: Connection timed out. (Delay = 5 sec)

    Auto Reconnect in 5 Secs, Please Wait

    Connecting...

    Disconnected: Connection timed out. (Delay = 5 sec)

    Auto Reconnect in 5 Secs, Please Wait

    Connecting...

    Disconnected: Join Flood Prevention. (Delay = 10 sec)

    Connecting...

    Disconnected: You are banned. (Delay = 10 sec)

  11. Once upon the time there was the MTA Team. There was also gta, that didn't had mp in it, but soon Zeus went to sleep.

    Then Timmy got heart disease! Zeus little son Ares went to help Timmy, but they both died.

    Then Ransom woke up. Ransom ran and ran to a great place, where Posty goes and kills him with his m60. But then MAD_BOY comes en kicks Posty's ass, that makes Aeron do anything but stay on topic. Then IJs walks in with an owned stick and proudly exclaims "ALL YOUR CAPSLOCKS ARE BELONG TO US!!1 But suddenly he was kicked for CAPS, and then "nickl245 did come, spam and it was good.

    Two days later... MrBill walked in with his goats, the goats mooed for some odd reason, and MrBill humped me. me liked it and thought MrBill was the coolest moderator EVER! But now he isnt, so MrBill shot utopia and killed him.

    Then, MrBill soiled himself and started humping the goats, but something happened and a goat ran away, because he humped it to hard. So he fetched his lube and some sheep bait.

    Then a lamer named nikl came over and sucked everyone off the end of his Vacuum cleaner while he was wearing his poofy gay apron and weilding a picket sign saying: "Phuk j00 Rule, Sign 0n my Bo0bieZz!!1" .

    Next the lamer n1ckl245 was caught ironing in his maid costume by the mta crew, he was sentenced to an asskicking, it was mutual. The asskicking began and went too far, thus the expression "An April Fools joke, gone bad.

    But EL Burro was having fun, he was just about to whip out his Chainsaw singing "Im a littleTeapot" when... Phuk came and sliced him with the chainsaw and said "APRIL FOOLS" then, DrEaM4D was puking @ his little chainsaw and showing him his big old friend.

    Then,boss came in, slapped El Burro with a 'YOUR MY DADDY' sig and found bill humping a goat in El Burro's 'YOU CAN BE OUR MEAT' truck... and he died because the sheep was wielding a stubby shotgun, next it ran to the local Wal-Mart because it needed condoms but when it got there, to its great misfortune, it saw that the store was closed.

    So the sheep made their own condom and tried it on nikl, cause nikl is weilding a katana, that then stabbed the goat and then got stabbed into El Burro's belly that then got open and droped the drugs.Then the sheep fell on burros 'menu'(the bloody drugs!!!) and landed on nikl's katana.... then smeg head got confused and blew Nikl's face off with a stubby, found trying to escape, Posty and the rest of ULK go after Smeg to get his stubby but Phuk stops and kills all of ulk.

    Then... admin Aeron kicked Phuk out of the game for suspected cheater. Phuk go so pissed off he got IJs to kline aeron from irc permanently.

    There after Kent fell madly in love with Robpol and Robpol didn't exactly complain. They then set off into the sunset and lived happily ever after in an ice cream truck filled with pink dildos and ky jelly.

    Suddenly they spot Mr Bill running towards them, too busy to notice they shrug their shoulders and get back to eating the Jelly. Mr Bill climbs in the Truck and lets the Handbrake go, the truck then starts speeding down a hill towards a... rock and the truck blows up. But... MrBill and Kent survive, rob is dead and goes to Hell where he spends the rest of eternity eating Bison Puke and drinking the devils nasty juices. But MrBill and Kent then went to the Malibu, they ordered many tequilas and things got a little out of hand...

    They went to go rape nickl, and nickl seemed to like it. Then phuk came and nikl raped phuk and phuk seemed to like it more than nikl so nikl went in the kitchen to cook some... sausage for zoot and zoot seemed to like it so much that nikl gave zoot more of his sausage.

    Then zoot ate the sausage with eggs and waffles and it was good. phuk started crying because he didnt have any... balls to have his... breakfast?!?!?...

    So anyway, smeg went out shopping and bought some cheese, peperoni and...bacon to bake everyone a... lovely stubby supper, complete with garlic bread and molotov, but smeg overcooked it so he gave it to a bum, the bum ate the burnt supper and ... he died.

    So then a big, huge fight started and... then Wheelman's massive penis made them stop arguing, and get to being jealous... and Wheelman's Mum was standing there infront of wheelman and he realised he had dreamt having a massive penis... and his mom was playing with it.

    Everyone was scared and said... MADBOY STOP WATCHING UR PORNO!!! And MADBOY said... it's from rob!

    But then Ransom walked in and called Robpol86 a BOSNAR! Then Robpol said SOB just before his boss BUSTED him while he was extracting dextromethropolithan (drug) from cough sirup at his work. Then the boss called him a SOB and suddenly the phone rang again and some corny tisd.net customer said he knew robert pooley because he heard the well known phone call between Ransom and Robpol.

    And while Ransom was calling Kent with his free long-distance calls, he was also busy at work trying to mate big chinese pandas. He sprayed them with green flourescent spray paint to make them more attractive.

    The pandas not only mated, they..Ran around and gave eachother blowjobs and orgys....and [LsL]Dark helped them. Meanwhile curly was whining about his forum idiot rank, while everyone knows that he is an idiot, so they said... YATTA! and they all made madboyphpwiki-1.3.9 and published it on sourceforge.net, they named it after madboy because he was busted after being mounted by a huge animal in his...school bag.

    IJs started to melt and almost everyone began to cry, MrBill came in and asked for his.. goats, his goats were scared of him, so they ran into ransom, ransom took one and said: "Hello there u sexy thing - want to do what dark did to those pandas?" So the sheep ran away again, cause they tought it was bill in costume.

    They found a great site and they downloaded..... Vice City then they got mta, so the sheep met another sheep online and communitcated using bah bah and shit, and 1 of em got offended by the bah bah and shot the other sheep in the face and took his nose off, then the sheep jumped through the monitor onto the other sheep (undamaged) and dropped his nose on him then the sheep undamaged did a ninja kickflip and started to kick the shit outta the sheep with no nose, then the sheep with no nose... decided Talidan, MrBill, MAD_BOY and Robpol86 (which was revived again) should visit a youth hostel in the UK.

    So they did, and in the middle of the night Robpol86 woke Ransom, it seemed like Robpol was posessed, and he asked Ransom very quietly: I like boners with caramel and cherry sauce. "AGAIN???? Ok but it's the last time" Ransom said.

    Meanwhile, while Ransom went out to get the cherry sauce, he saw MrBill and MAD_BOY doing nothing of interest on the bushes, so he decided to... join and they had a great time in the bushes, until policeman [sM]Boss arrested them for having...fun. Cause boss wanted that they had... free internet access from tisd.net, including email with spamfilter and Ransom in garlic sauce with garlic bread and they were sentenced by Boss to take the next plane to Amsterdam to smoke some weed, so they...would have real "nederwiet". Now most people think what's nederwiet, so ransom tells them in a psycho way: Hey, I know how to say bosnar which is dutch and means forest clown, so back off. Besides backwards my name is mosnar which is moss clown in Dutch!

    So Ransom was sentenced to lick the moss, by judge julie in sex court, while his girlfriend... Cray really liked clipping his toe nails. And he decided to share the salami, he just bought at the butcher, with eAi. But eAi punched everyone with a big tofu ball, because he was a vegetarian.

    Suddenly IJs had a craving for KFC...so IJS went to the KFC house to talk to them but he fell downstairs... he wondered why this KFC was a house and he sued them for all they're worth for falling down the staircase, he claimed a plunger was placed at the top of the staircase. The next moment Robpol86 popped up and directed all KFC members to his brand new Tisd.net van he got from his boss the day before, when they were all in, he unzipped his pants and they started... playing pattycake while Kent showed up at the door, saw this, and got sad cos they didnt let him in the game. They just played with Kent watching it. He was so sad that he took a hammer and... broke a window at the Wall o mart while Vass was... masturbating in the KFC kitchen preparing the "special sauce" for the food.

    Kent came back, not only to find vass masturbating, but DeathB was by his side giving himself the time, then DgtaDude joined in.

    The Next day the kitchen was full of a sticky white liquid, women seem to like to bath in it until ransom thought he would have a try and... then he realized he was being posessed by dark, so he stomped a mudhole in dark and threw him into the vat o' white liquid.

    After a year of nonsense going on...ransom and ijs met up at the KFC coffe house to change money to drugs. bad luck for ransom he wanted to pay with japanese money but ijs wast pleased and...Excited, he got his Gun and !!BANG!! shot himself in the head, ransom sat there laughing because he had the drugs and the money...

    7000 years later, Wheelman's great great grandson started to play MTA, for Grand Theft Auto: Pluto. He dominated people left and right, and eventually met a guy named {ULK}DeathZ who was a very late predecessor of Gary and.. DeathZ owned Wheelman(aka batman)'s great grandson cause he actually was a n00b.

    Suddenly MrBump came and said: "Ill ban u both for being so lame. Get out of this game or i will slap u."

    Then came the real batman back and said i invented a time machine...AND DECIDED TO RULE THE WORLD HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH........but then suddenly vass stole his time machine and kicked batman back to 1914... He was left there. Sux for him. Just then DeathZ tried to figure out how MrBump was still alive... it was his scripts! THEY ARE SO ADVANCED! They now create and improve themselves! They work using donkeys. Donkeys owned the world but got trapped into 1 of bumps scripts so bump.... hooked the donkey up to the computer to upgrade it from steam power.

    Then happened an accident and all the donkey died. Now bump and DeathZ had to get batman back to their teahouse to drink some tea and eat biscuits, batman said i don't like tea and biscuits i aint a british :o and ransom turned around and bitchslapped him, there was a big fight.. at the end of it.. batmans ass was red cos everybody slapped him, ransom had to buy a new beer bottle he had broken and deathz went to the hospital wit a broken leg...

    The hostpital security said: "ur not allowed in cos ur gay :o off." But deathz... thought: "let's kick him in the balls, but he fainted."

    And suddenly xerox came in and teleported everyone back to the past, but while they were in the teleporter (which was jacked from Batman while he was visiting a coffee shop in Amsterdam), xerox... likes pie. And they went to Germany and laughed at germans.

    Then nikl laughed at them and got klined for antihitlerism. some then unklined nickl and when he came back he was laughed at they klined him again, so he decided to kick his grandpa and laugh at the grandson of DrEaM4D who dominated the world for 5000 years in MTA in future.

    But lets teleport to 5000 years later...

    Everyone was addicted to cheese and classed as a class A drug then Brophy aint it and got soo high it made him want to give all his money and gold to vass.

    He gave but the gold wast real so vass slapped himm and... Phuk came and killed them both. So he runs off with the stuff and... tripped and fell because of a rock, making everything to fall into the near lava river, so phuk jumped in and... burned his ass.

    Now that the zombies came back, the world... blew up and only the only people who survived were dark... and black dragon (actually he isnt a human but what the hey) so they went to mars and dragon built his home in its north pole and dark... but Mr.Bump's kick/ban script didn't like that so he banned his home from the list, but the script didn't work because... the lamas came from mars...

    He was so intelligent he decided to try to fly but wat he forgot was his wings and.... he fell down and broke his teeth.

    OMG deathz is back...but deathz died by a stubby up his ass the only way to die suicide.

    Nick's biological great X14 grandson, nickl269 then grabbed onto a staf and rubbed his hand along it shouting "i am the king" then his hand got lower and lower into his pants...and he touched his toes!

    Meanwhile at the other end of the galaxy... Mr.Bill ate a bag of marijuana so he went in sleep and... shit himself because windows got a blue screen! Some computer :o call it the blue screen of death because it is a blue screen and it kills people by turning them to stone(d)!! while bill was shitting himself betty was making a big soup made out of pussy hair! 10 kittens where killed.... and somehow Mr. Bill decided to lick the blue screen and suddenly it disappeared. He reported the blue screen solution to Microsoft and Microsoft brought out Windows Update with lick support, but then the RIAA came bitchin on Microsoft cause they didnt want people to.... download movies, because those movies pay the camera men, the janitors, the light fixers, the makeup guys, not just the... MTA Team. And of course, the MTA team needed that money, or else they would not get their... soup for the day. Aeron kills, stabs, muders, kicks, rapes, beats, licks, trows, clowns, pokes IJs to death because he edited MY story without permission.Nick then carries off the body to the laboratory to carry out genetic research about ijs humaness(humanity?). Then he puts him on the table and puts some cables into his head. He counts down 3..2..1 and puts down a switch. Ijs wakes up and gets a stone to.... rub on his nipples so ijs gets hot and they start both... feeling each others asses and [VCK]KEZZ@ looks astounded at that dirty behaviour, and bd slaps kezza for double posting AGAIN, and wonders off to his own stuff. at the same time, on the other side of the galaxy, El Burro exiles himself from Planet Party Server because he was Drunk and Disorderly and should be ashamed calling Nika rude names such as... RACIST!!!then came vass and made the next page... while eating some pears, yum....then hes slave vendetta came in... and sat on Vasses knee. When asked what he wanted for Christmas, Utopia replied..."i want a big bag of spam"... So, Santa Claus came and smashed Utopia's head with the huge bag of spam. Then Santa Claus said... "Did that hurt?", Utopia nodded his head and Santa proceeded to bash his head abit more with a....little peace of a fishy fish...that he got from black dragon, that was selling fish and other useful stuff at the back of his car so his car stinks like a fish, then he thought about Fish Dragon... and it finnaly hit him! the next best thing is gonna be a mcduff lamaburger, after eating that burger fishy went to the new mta irc channel, and bump banned him, coz HE DID NOTHING! MUAHAHAHAHAHA! after that fishy cried and killed himself. fishy's ghost registered at gamesurge and banned mrbump for finally switching to dsl, mrbump...´got himself a 100mbit connection and ate up all 56k guys, and before he did so, Burro bought a 56.1k and avoided MrBumps nasty big chompers... so MrBump banned him for

  12. Disconnected: Connection timed out. (Delay = 5 sec)

    Auto Reconnect in 5 Secs, Please Wait

    Connecting...

    Disconnected: Connection timed out. (Delay = 5 sec)

    Auto Reconnect in 5 Secs, Please Wait

    Connecting...

    Disconnected: Connection timed out. (Delay = 5 sec)

    Auto Reconnect in 5 Secs, Please Wait

    Connecting...

    Disconnected: Connection timed out. (Delay = 5 sec)

    Auto Reconnect in 5 Secs, Please Wait

    Connecting...

    Disconnected: Join Flood Prevention. (Delay = 10 sec)

    Connecting...

    Disconnected: You are banned. (Delay = 10 sec)

    Righty ho... :lol:

  13. To me, everything is fine apart from cheating. I do get annoyed when I die from mollies or Heli's for the umteenth time, if its an accident I take no notice. The way I see it is that Mollies and Nades are the only way to soften up Stubby tactics when you fire, run, fire, run... that tactic is hellish with the lag i have. :roll:

  14. Led Zeppelin- Over the Hills and Far away

    then its Rammstien- Wolt ihr das bett in flammen sehen? (what a name!)

    I dunno why I have so much Rammstien... i ain't even German, but thier good nonetheless...

    Is that the name of the song?

    Yeah, its on "Houses of the Holy"

×
×
  • Create New...