Open the banlist file, delete everything inside, save it and restart your server. Also make sure the syntax in your config file is correct. Post it here if you want me to verify it (remove passwords though).
First of all, you don't need your OWN IRC server. You need MTAmA (look in the Addons forum) and an echo script. I'm sure there are plenty of them around, just ask in the Addons forum.
The old forum was phpBB 2.x
This is phpBB 3.x (still beta I believe).
The reason there aren't as many features anymore is because those were phpBB 2.x mods which are not compatible with phpBB 3.x (yet).
What CPU do you have and how much RAM?
MTA uses more resources than GTASA on its own so it will require more beef from your PC. Plus, frame limiter is forced on in MTA anyway.
There is no anticheat.def in MTA 0.5, it's just that this idiot has posted in the wrong section.
As for answering your question...make sure you have anticheat enabled in your config file and that anticheat.def actually exists.
I used to have this problem too...my ping out of game was 15 but in game it was always 1000. I don't remember how I fixed it though, it seems to have just sorted itself.
You need to ask your network administrator to open the ports because it's HIGHLY likely that you're behind a proxy which blocks everything but port 80 and 443.